- Mine Corona -

I have a terrible habit.




It's contagious - to me.




It's insanely hard to control.




It's like and ever expanding virus, and I wish sometimes I didn't have this.




It's the kinda habit that bonds everyone else yet breaks myself down.





It's the kinda habit that connects with few people.





These people are usually exact opposites of myself.





Were I to meet someone similar, a clash is bound to happen.





And I'd have to try even harder to break the tension.





This habit excalates socializing, yet detaches me from my past intimates.





I will tell you what it is now.




It is my ability to socialize.




I like challenging myself.





I love placing myself in an environment whereby the people I know are the least.




And see how long it takes me to get to the top.





Many experiences in my past have shown me that there are countless ways to the top.




And one of the best ways is to be outright bold.




Many many many many other factors and behaviours are also essential to make oneself seem innocent yet you know you want something.




Unfortunately I cannot share this for this habit is highly dangerous.




To place all the above in simple terms,




- I like making new friends
- I like having a high position of responsibility
- I like sucking up
- I can bring a group of people who don't know each other to be close friends with each other within a matter of days
- And I have the mannerisms to acheive the above easily.



Advantage in a nutshell:

~ I can easily be a friend of all.




Now to why it is so deadly.




I don't want to be what I define myself as.




I don't purposely suck up.




I haven't experienced everything yet - more often than not I find myself having to compromise.




Or be the laughing stock for doing something wrong.




And my biggest problem is...




Should I not meet a perfect opposite...





I might be able to adapt, but not be able to blend.





Which means..




I can be a friend of all, yet a buddy of none.



And in the end, if were to come by the day where I really meet no opposite or my compromising tactics fail...




I will be all alone..




That is why..




I should stop..




But then again...




Having the world revolve around me can be quite tempting...




*sigh*